He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
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I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
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If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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