Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Randomize
