Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
