last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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