is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
