whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Randomize
