Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Randomize
