what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
