i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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