i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
