so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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