do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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