I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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