I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
