can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize