I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
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