the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
