Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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