I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
