You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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