Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
