My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
