I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
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