trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize