worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
