I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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