I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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