didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
