I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Randomize
