I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
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