No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
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