So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
