Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
