I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
