Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Randomize