Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Girls should come with a carfax report
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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