doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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