Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
