My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
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