Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
