think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
