She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
We talked him into tasing himself.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
