Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Non-Jews are for practice
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize
