ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Someone came in the potted fern
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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