Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize