I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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