i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
