He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
