Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I will die if light touches me.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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