you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
she woke up with a sticky ear
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
