the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
